What We Can Learn from Japan about Respect

IMG_2119Looking over my pictures from a recent trip to Japan (click on photos to enlarge) got me thinking about this centuries-old culture. It’s a beautiful country with a certain set of characteristics that make it seem insular, cohesive and unique. There is a tight-knit social fabric, no immigration and the only spoken language is Japanese.

IMG_2895With over 34 million people in Tokyo and the surrounding areas, it’s amazingly well organized. Trains and subways run exactly on time, like a Swiss clock. You don’t see any graffiti in common areas or trash on the streets even though there are no disposal cans. It seems as if every person has a role to play that contributes to the collective wellbeing. There’s awareness that whatever one does has an impact on everyone else. Respect, at the core of their cultural values, is ingrained in the rituals and traditions:

IMG_2040Respect for others. Fundamental moral standards are woven deep into the society. Individuals have a strong sense of duty toward family, colleagues and community. Japanese hospitality, called omotenashi, is ever apparent in the hotels, ryokans and restaurants you visit. The employees anticipate the needs and desires of each guest. This includes everything from making sure you feel relaxed and satisfied, to the host’s genuine attitude and attention to detail. Honestly, the service everywhere is exceptional and the series of bows you receive when you leave is humbling. Bowing back just becomes automatic.

IMG_2139Respect for rules. Good manners and being sensitive to other people is taught to very young children at home and in school. Fierce loyalty is valued and saving face is seen as bringing honor to oneself and one’s culture. Persistent negative emotions such as anger, disappointment and sadness as well as having problems like bankruptcy, divorce or addiction are often considered shameful. Unfortunately, suicide has long been a means of atoning for defeat, disgrace, or any dishonorable action.

IMG_2611Respect for beauty. You see the extent to which the culture values harmony with nature when enjoying a traditional multi-course dinner. It is called kaiseki and consists of 15 different dishes, all with natural, fresh and high quality ingredients. Attentive and graceful women in kimonos serve and the presentation is breathtaking. The food is creative, often adorned with flowers and leaves. Served in tableware of different colors, shapes and designs with various tastes and textures, It’s an assault to your senses.

IMG_1930In many recent disasters, the Japanese people have persevered, remaining civil and considerate while enduring impossible hardships. This is known as gaman, a Zen Buddhism principle that means suffering the seemingly unbearable with patience and dignity. Gaman has been  described in many ways-as a law, a virtue, a trait or an attitude.

IMG_2079Suffering selflessly and helping others are at the core of Japan’s national character. When do we put the common good ahead of individual interests? What are examples of our collective tolerance and patience? How can we better demonstrate strength and caring in the face of crisis? Some food for thought around the holiday table.

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6 Responses to What We Can Learn from Japan about Respect

  1. i so enjoyed reading this Phyllis! We in the US could learn some very valuable lessons and ways of life from these people! It seems that they are one with nature and understand life so well!

    Also what is the reason for the math exercise? I know you have one my dear!

    • phyllis says:

      Thanks, Jo Ann! The beauty of the countryside and the serenity of the local people make Japan a must for your bucket list!

  2. When I see a math question or any other for that matter I feel compelled to answer! I suppose this means I am obsessive compulsive, Enlighten me please!

    • phyllis says:

      Not OC, just curious, Jo Ann. The math question is called CAPTCHA and it’s a safety device for websites. If you didn’t answer it, you wouldn’t have been able to post your comment. The purpose is to differentiate humans from machines and minimize spam or hacking. Here’s a link if you want to learn more about it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CAPTCHA

  3. Beautifully written Phyllis. I was so glad to have been a part in making your trip! Keep spreading this great information!!
    Darina

  4. phyllis says:

    Good to hear from you, Darina. Visiting the more rural areas in Japan, hiking the ancient trails and meeting local people made the trip magical – thanks!

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