picking up after divorce

We have recently been focusing on improving the relationship with your significant other. But, truth-be-told, sometimes relationships come to an end and divorce is the result. What to do then to pick up the pieces and take the first steps toward living a full life again? How do you turn a crisis into a challenge?

Lisa was divorced when her son was in grade school. Soon after, she lost her job in the wake of massive lay offs. Finding herself at a crossroads, she decided to take a chance and follow the passion she had dreamed about for years – to write a book. “Going forward, I feel empowered and alive. After years of working in the support of others, I am now the artist. It is a truly wondrous experience as I move into the next phase of my life.”

You too can respond to a dramatic change by tapping into more optimistic thoughts and seeing the situation as a challenge. Create an opportunity to focus your energies and pursue your own dream. Change the negatives to positives as you choose your path. Here are some steps to help on your journey.

Look back over your life and review how you have dealt with other major changes. What have you learned from your life experiences? As philosopher George Santayana said, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” Recall what worked and employ the most effective coping strategies again. Discard what didn’t.

Assess your strengths and how you have used them in particular situations before. Has your curiosity or love of learning encouraged you to gather information from the Internet, books or seminars in order to facilitate your decision making? Whereas some strengths may come naturally to you, others many have to be developed through hard work. Evaluate how you can build on your assets now.

Next week we will offer some more tips to help you accomplish the goals you set for yourself.

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